My second day as a style icon sees me hitting the road, on a work trip for the day job (the one I plan to keep only until I land that Vogue cover).
I arrive at the airport ready to share my travel look with the world. Yet I am immediately confronted with a problem: my arms are apparently too short to take a selfie that captures anything more than my head.
I am, however, in an airport: where better to shop for accessories for my small electronics? I set off in search of an item I have long avowed never to purchase: a selfie stick.
I try all the Hudson Newsstands in Terminal B.
Then there is a brief moment of excitement when the sales guy at InMotion thinks we’ll find one in the 20% Off bin:
But there are no selfie sticks to be had in Terminal B. Don’t people want to take snaps of themselves on their vacations? Apparently selfie sticks are no longer a thing; and likely only a 59-year-old with minimal experience as a Style Icon would even think to ask for one.
Yet I am confused. Instagram is full of people--Style Icons!--who are taking full-body shots of themselves and their outfits, every single day. How in the world are they doing this?
Two hypotheses:
- Style icons have very long arms.
- To be a style icon, you need to travel with an entourage, so someone else can take your picture.
I, sadly, have left my entourage at home. And my arms aren’t likely to grow anytime soon.
I do manage to prop my phone up on a seat in the waiting area at Gate 27, and with the help of the timer, I land this shot:
So now you know how Style Icon Midlifemomsongs dresses for a day in transit! Mac jeans; long-sleeve tee shirt from Garnet Hill, red cardigan to show that I am claiming my power and agency. We covered this yesterday.
Absent selfie stick and entourage, I can’t show you the full look, with accessories (suitcase and backpack) and footwear (sneakers). Nonetheless, I am prepared to share the secret of how to look great while traveling. And here it is:
YOU CAN’T. Air travel in 2024 is irritating, at best; you will likely be in a moderately pissy mood most of the way, especially after you realize that you have left your fabulous bright red Style Icon lipstick at home. Who looks good in a scowl?
Besides, everyone around you is thinking about other things. They are wondering if there will be room in the overhead bin for their carry-ons. If there are any water filling stations in Terminal B that aren’t hampered by prostate problems. How long they will need to hold that soggy apple core before a flight attendant comes by to collect their Service Items. If JetBlue will ever bring back those tasty Terra chips.
In short, don’t waste your energy: nobody gives a rat’s ass how you look. Although they may be curious about why you are trying so very hard to take a selfie in the airport.